YOUR LIFE A-Z WISDOM

ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE BLESSED

WISDOM

WISDOM requires integrating a value system of reflection, experience, good judgement, and discernment.  It does not come without experience.  WISDOM is a characteristic of living a life with soft eyes and gentle footsteps.  WISDOM allows the wise one to take his/her time in making decisions, speaking his/her truth, and a following a clear path of compassion with fellow people encountered on the path.  To practice WISDOM is to be aware of your thoughts and how your thoughts affect your quality of daily life.  Each day counts.  Each day you make a difference in your life and the life of others by your thoughts, words, and actions.  Awareness of how you impact others and your own quality of life is essential to establishing quality and virtue in living.  If you want to live a better life, seek daily WISDOM.  Ask for compassion and WISDOM. Ask for guidance as to how to make the best choices for yourself and those you come in contact with.  Practice WISDOM with your spending.  You work hard for your money. Choose where to spend it and how to spend it, but don't become cheap.  Buy quality.  Enjoy living.  Enjoy the day to day grind.  WISDOM is enjoying the moment.  Place a slice of lemon in your water and notice your smile and quality of living increase.  WISDOM is in tandem with enjoyment and quality.  If you don't experience enjoyment and quality of life, you are not practicing WISDOM.  Make today a day of enjoyment and quality even if it is as simple as buying fresh flowers for your table.

YOUR LIFE A-Z VALUE

ENJOY THE ARRANGEMENT OF BEAUTY

VALUE

What is it that you value and how do you know that you value it?  Value is also a word that one needs to "qualify"; how much value do I place on that which I value.   Because we are at the start of the New Year, let's not talk about monetary value, but heart value.  If we really value someone, why is it that we really don't listen to what s/he says or needs?  Why do we continue our same old behavior that they tell us hurts them.  Is it because we really don't care if we hurt them or is it because we just believe they are trying to change us and we refuse to change for the good of the couple-hood or family.  See, value is not as simple as it sounds.  In fact, value is quite complicated.  So during this time of taking the Twenty Minute Coach as a serious route of change for this coming year, spend some reflective time with the word value.  The dictionary says to value something is to decide on its worth, importance, and its usefulness.  I do not believe we can value others until we value ourselves.  But, paradoxically, unless we value others they are not going to stick around unless they believe they deserve someone who does not hear them.  What would be so wrong with making some change for those around you?  What is it that you really value?

YOUR LIFE A-Z USE

USE COLOR, TOUCH, TASTE, TEXTURE, 

USE

Yes, USE it!  This is a great time to get rid of clutter.  The Twenty Minute Coach has talked about de-clutter before. Start with your kitchen drawers.  I imagine there are many gadgets that looked like a great tool that is still sitting there unused, like a lime squeezer or egg timer.  Pass them on to the local thrift store. Next go through your cabinets and get rid of all that you are not USING.  Do you dare tackle your garage next?  Get those bikes out and USE them.  USE up the food in your pantry and freezer this month to save money in your food budget this month.  USE things that you have put to the back of the closet.  If you are not USING certain things in your home, toss it.  Make space for USEABLE items.  Practice paying attention to all of the things that you USE and ask yourself if the item serves you well.  Replace your tooth brush. USE your body! USE your voice, speak up and ask for what you need.  USE your fingers to touch.  USE your nose to smell the roses.  USE your eyes to really see what is around you.  USE your ears to hear your partner.  USE your brain to think for yourself and to think outside of the box.  Use your mouth and tongue to explore the subtleties of taste.  USE your dreams to get more of what you want out of your life. USE all of what is available to you every day.

YOUR LIFE A-Z TOUCH

TOUCH BY PAYING ATTENTION TO COLOR

TOUCH

TOUCH is a perfect word to follow the word silence. TOUCH is an important part of mindfulness. I invite you to pay attention to the art of TOUCH today.  Look around your environment at choose three items to pick up and TOUCH.  Place the three items by your chair and spend your five minutes in silence.  Afterward pick up the first object and run your fingers around the outline.  Notice the texture, temperature, and feel of the object.  Notice your thoughts and feelings as you take time to get to know this object just by TOUCH.  Then close your eyes and do this again.  Do this again and see if you "see" something that you didn't see with your eyes open.  Repeat this with each item.  This simple exercise will help you be more aware of the sensation of TOUCH.  Reach across your table tonight and TOUCH your partner or your kids.  Pay attention to TOUCHING your pet.  Notice things that you TOUCH, things that are in your daily life.  What is it that you like about your coffee cup, your tooth brush, or even your face?  Get some lotion and pay close your attention to how you feel nurturing your body with gentle TOUCH all over.  Treat yourself to a massage.  What would life be like if you did not have the sensation of TOUCH?  Who in your life needs a gentle touch to the top of their hand? Do that the next time you are around them. Celebrate the power of TOUCH today.

YOUR LIFE A-Z SILENCE

SERENE AND SILENT

SILENCE is one of the most important mindful techniques and tools that you can integrate into your daily life.  Set a timer and sit for 5 minutes.  Do nothing but sit.  What was that like?  Did your mind abuse you with negative thoughts about wasting time and not getting things done?  Did you notice sounds that you would have missed because you were not mindful of them, like birds chirping or the soft whirl of the heating unit?  It is also useful to practice SILENCE when you have nothing kind or nice to say.  Being SILENT in the middle of chaos can calm everyone down.  It is easier to explore any situation that is happening if you give it a moment of reflective SILENCE.  If you are someone who needs background noise such as music or TV playing in the background,then choose to turn that static noise off for ½ hour a day and notice what happens.  If you do that for thirty days, I believe you will notice a positive difference in your being.  SILENCE is not only golden, it is also electric.  It allows you the time to tune into important internal information and pay attention to feelings, emotions, and thoughts by giving wisdom a chance to settle in around you. Like a wonderful gentle blanket letting you know without words what you need to focus on next.  If you have an important question that you are trying to obtain an answer to, just ask it and practice SILENCE until you know the answer.  You will know when you know.  

YOUR LIFE A-Z READ

READ
What is it that you always wanted to know or to do?  READ about it.  Find out as much as you can about those subjects that interest you.  Make yourself a research project and become an expert on anything you want to know about.  READ as a way to educate, stimulate, and develop passion.  There are so many things out there to do and to discover and talented authors can take you there by the way they make the words on a page dance life right into your being.
Here are some interesting reads if you want to know something more about spirituality and Buddhism, read Pema Chodron’s, The Places that Scare You. To enjoy an entirely different take on Buddhism read, Buddha Walks Into the Bar by Lodro Rinzler.  If you want to understand the history and spiritual connection with the Virgin Mary, read Clarissa Pinkola Estes book, Untie the Strong Woman: Blessed Mother’s Immaculate Love for the Wild Soul or if you have an avid researcher inside give the History of God a whirl by Karen Armstrong.  For a psychological vacation, read Brene Brown’s The Gifts of Imperfection or if you are feeling lost try The Passion Test by Atwood and Atwood.  Want to explore the caves of your own soul spend some time working on Janet Conner’s Writing Down the Soul or the Lotus and the Lily.  Of course there are many wonderful novels to read, so whatever suits your fancy, go explore the world of READING today.  Don’t forget that I have IN A MOMENT’S NOTICE: A PSYCHOLOGIST’S JOURNEY WITH BREAST CANCER and it is just a click away at Amazon or Barnes and Nobles.

YOUR LIFE A-Z QUIT

A SLOTH IS A GREAT ANIMAL TO HELP YOU QUIT

Just for today, one day out of your life, QUIT talking negatively about yourself and others.  In order for you to do this, you must become aware of how negative you are.  Awareness, as I have spoken about is the first step to change.  Without awareness you do not really live life, you just exist. In order to live more fully it is important to QUIT doing things that harm yourself.  It is often helpful to imagine that negativity is a big icky ball of green slime.  Each time you are negative in your thoughts, words, or actions, that green slime attaches itself to your physical body.  So by the end of each day you are covered with smelly, icky green slime that weighs you down. The way to QUIT slimming yourself is to QUIT that old habitual negative talk.  A good technique to help yourself QUIT, is to wear a rubber band on your wrist and snap it each time you catch yourself being negative. The snapping sound keeps the slime away.  If you are too self-conscious for that, then choose a different bracelet or watch than you normally wear.  Each time you catch yourself being negative twist your bracelet or watch around your wrist once as an awareness building tool to help you QUIT.  You can use this QUITTING tool to help you QUIT whatever it is you want to QUIT, but it is essential to QUIT talking negatively in order to be happier on a daily basis.