YOUR LIFE A-Z: LIMiT

BE CLEAR

LIMIT

This is a fun word.  Know your limits.  Do you?  Or do you only discover your limit when your kid, partner, friend or boss pushes you one more time and you explode?   All of us have limits but most of us have no clue as to what they are; and as a result, end up tired, frayed, uptight, and angry because we are over stressed, over worked and over committed.  It is your responsibility to post your limits so that others know what to expect from you.  Perhaps you have noticed when you are driving in a new town and you have driven for a bit and do not see a speed limit sign and you get a bit anxious.  “Oh no, I wonder if it’s 25 or 40 miles per hour here?”  If you are going 40 MPH in a 25 MPH zone you are going to get a ticket.  So it is best to go a little slower until you know for sure what your limits are.  Everything and everyone has limits.  A LIMIT is a good thing.  It is not a bad, weak, or mean thing. A LIMIT lets others know what is expected and it is easy to co-exist in your environment when everyone knows what to expect.  It is important to spend sometime defining your limits in the various arenas of your life.  What are your limits at work, with friends, kids, or yourself?  Define them and begin to live within them.  You will be less stressed when you do this.  Just in the last A-Z I asked your to make a time-limit when trying to choose something different.  Great tool to try. 

Your Life A-Z NO

BE CAREFUL

NO!

UH-OH.  No?  Are you telling me I can’t have what I think I want?  Are you telling me to use my voice and say “no?”   That is not very nice.  I can’t possibly tell my mother "no" or my child "no" or ____________"no."   I just can’t do that.

Well if that is what you really believe, then please, by all means, go ahead and impulsively get yourself into debt by buying what it is you want right now.  Go ahead and eat that extra brownie and watch your sugar levels increase and decrease while putting extra weight on your body to lug around all day.  Go ahead and take care of everyone else by saying "yes", even when you really want to say "no."  Let those resentful feelings continue to build up inside of you with all of the “yes” answers to those who are accustomed to you doing whatever it is they need when they think they need it.  YES…all of that is happening inside of you while you continue to be miserable with a lack of boundaries in your life.   So, today is a get out of jail free card.  Say “NO” to everyone and everything all day long.  Say “NO,” when you want to say "yes."  Practice today being not nice and just notice what it is like by the end of the evening.  Maybe you will actually enjoy the power of “NO” today.  Maybe today’s practice will help you use the word at least once a day to yourself or to someone else in your life.   Learning to say “NO” is one of the powerful lessons in your life. “NO” is a necessary and very important word.  Don’t ignore it.  Say “Yes” to saying “NO.” 

Photo: Pam Smead