Sunday, August 31, 2014



Be careful what you WEED out of your life.  It may be important to WEED out some of your toxic emotions that are hurting you.   However, it might be more important to ask those emotions, “What hurts so much that you stay so sad?”   I was pleasantly surprised to find that what might be considered WEEDS by some are actually helpful herbs, such as burdock, dandelion, goldenrod, milk thistle, St. John’s wort, and sumac are often considered WEEDS but are really healing ingredients in many herbal remedies.   Thus, it takes wisdom and education to figure out what WEED is good for you and what WEED is choking the life out of you.  WEEDS in general are not bad.  When a WEED begins to grow in your beautiful garden and choke the life out of your beans or tomatoes or even make your flowers appear weak, then it is a good idea to pull the WEEDS with manual labor or a pesticide free WEED killer.  If you are feeling stifled, smothered, or hampered by people you once thought were friends perhaps it is time to have a serious conversation with him/her.  That serious conversation can be likened to putting non-toxic pesticide on the friendship and requesting a dialogue about what is not working for you.  Perhaps you need to WEED out some of the aimless TV watching that is making you dull and stealing the vivaciousness of your daily life.  WEEDS require careful thought, mindful action, and gentle care.   Do not go through your life WEEDING out what you don’t like.  Ask, what does this WEED really need? 

Saturday, August 30, 2014



Be VIVACIOUS!  Be energetic, lively and embrace life fully. You don't have to be a super-star or a Hollywood actor to approach life as a vibrant loving VIVACIOUS person who enjoys a great walk in the park with a bounce in his/her step and a big smile on his/her face.  VIVACIOUS behavior is 90% mental energy and attitude. Who is the most VIVACIOUS person you know?  Take a minute to image that person in your mind's eye.  Pay attention to how that person walks. VIVACIOUS people walk with confidence and a spring in his/her step.  VIVACIOUS energy seems to be contagious.  When I am around someone who is VIVACIOUS I feel more alive and more interested in what is going on around me.  Dont let life become dull.  Go out and about today embracing the moment.  Walk with a bounce, dress in colors and put a smile on your face.  Tune into an inner space where you can find that person inside of you who loves life and delights in the simplest pleasures.   Enjoy with VIVACIOUS energy a blend of music today and the taste of simple healthy foods.  Enjoy the sun and bask in it for a while and if it is raining or snowing, delight in the diversity of nature.  Even nature changes colors, temperatures, and its weather to keep from becoming boring.  If every day were the same boredom would set it.   So change out a sense of dullness today for the VIVACIOUS you that longs to enjoy life deeply. 

Friday, August 29, 2014




UNLOCKING something that is shut up, stored away or even in prison is an important step in our heart’s growth.  As children we lock away emotions, feelings, huts, and beliefs often because they are too painful and we vow never to remember or talk about those painful things again.  However, our psyche does not do a good job of compartmentalizing pain.  Our psyche or soul generalizes pain.  So at  the age of six  you promised yourself you would never trust your mother again because she left you or abandoned you for a bottle of booze then that promise has hurt you the rest of your life.   That promise became a “vow” or a life script that you have acted out unconsciously every day and every other relationship since you were six.  It is a good thing not to trust a mother who abandons you but it is a life- harming thing to not trust other people because of your mother’s weakness.  Not everyone is like your mother and it is time to UNLOCK  the caverns of your heart where you have been hiding and come out into the light of life and learn to live with an UNLOCKED heart.  Be gentle with yourself as if you are going into a dark prison cell and show your locked in self the key.  Tell yourself, today I UNLOCKED your heart.  You are safe with me. I will help you learn to trust and live again and not be so afraid.  UNLOCK those closed off places today and step into all that life has to offer you. 

Wednesday, August 27, 2014



Do you TALK enough?  When you TALK what do you TALK about it?  To TALK is to communicate with words and TALK can take place at many levels.  TALK can be chitchat, which comprises of words that are platitudes and connections at the same time.  If you  don’t chitchat then you will  probably never advance toward a deep meaningful TALK with someone else.   Then there is informational TALK.  That level of TALK is about sharing necessary information on a need to know basis.  Using words to express your thoughts and feelings is an important skill to learn and to practice.  TALK is the language of connecting and getting around in the word.  Without TALK no conversations take place and the world can become a lonely and isolated place.  Conversations are necessary for us as humans and TALK  is essential for connected intimate relationships.  Your interpersonal relationships require TALK on both the chitchat and on a deep meaningful level.  Don’t ignore the relationships next to you.  Tend to those relationships like a beautiful garden,  fertilize them with daily TALK.   Small words such as, “I love you;” “How was your day?;”  or even a wink across the room can be the TALK that keeps the relationship garden flourishing.  All gardens require weeding and that requires some difficult TALK.  It is important to be able to tell your relationships what you like and what you don’t like.  Maybe you don’t want pansies in your garden,  then you need to TALK about that too.  Connect today with a TALK within all of your relationships.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014


Nighty-Night ...Time to Wrap it Up for the Day. 


Now more than ever we know the  importance of a good night sleep.  We know proper SLEEP not only effects your energy level but also your health and longevity.  Each person requires a different amount of SLEEP but everyone should strive to make sure that they receive at least six hours of uninterrupted SLEEP.  SLEEP is important for memory, learning, safety, and our immune system.  What are your SLEEP patterns?  How do you know if you had a good nights sleep?  Do you dream?  Do you remember your dreams?  Dreaming cannot take place if you are not getting the necessary amount of SLEEP.  Dreams are important for our mental health.  SLEEP often gets a bad rap and often those who need more SLEEP than others are considered wimps.  SLEEP is worth the attention and work it needs to make sure you are getting enough of it.  SLEEP is an important as eating correctly and exercising.  Inadequate SLEEP over a long period of time will take you down a path of poor health, low energy, lack of concentration and even make your day life unsafe for you.  Some tips for a good nights SLEEP:
Have a regular pattern, including a set bedtime and set awake time.
Cut-off electronics an hour prior to bedtime and read or listen to relaxing music. (or even meditate) 
If you wake up do not get up but lay there and pray or count backwards from 100-0 until you fall back to sleep. 
Consult your doctor if you are SLEEP deprived. 

Monday, August 25, 2014


“REJOICE and love yourself today, ‘cause baby you were born this way.”  Lady Gaga’s lyrics to the song Born This Way are quite powerful and if you allow yourself  to close our eyes and listen a sense of hope is birthed.  The word REJOICE is an action verb that promotes an inner response of “yes.”   REJOICE implies that you exclaim, shout, dance, and proclaim out loud an inner delight and exuberance.  What makes you REJOICE?  What makes you SING?  What make you feel alive and want to tell everyone how excited you are to be you in this moment and time?   REJOICE is an action response of gratitude.  Take a walk through your closet and chose a favorite outfit and REJOICE (do a little jig) that you are blessed enough to have favorite clothes in your closet.  REJOICE that you are able to be alive right now in this very moment regardless of how tough it might be in your life, express some gratitude for what “is” verses looking at what isn’t.   REJOICE in the small things in life and those small things will become more expansive and important.  REJOICE and love yourself today just the way you are, allowing self-acceptance to overflow into your heart and your actions.  Choose a symbol that represents who you are and search for a piece of jewelry that expresses your uniqueness in a way that you can delight in.  REJOICE is an important word, own it and use it today. 

Friday, August 22, 2014




QUASI is a word that means partially or to some extent.  QUASI may seem like an unusual word for the TWENTY-MINUTE COACH to endorse.  However, each of us needs a starting point.  Often one does not start a plan because of the fear of failure, fearing that the project is too big or overwhelming.  When fear is in the way often the start button never gets turned on.  Thus a QUASI plan of action is better than no plan of action.  If fear has you immobilized then try writing a QUASI or partial plan on each of the eight threads.  Beginning a QUASI plan will give you permission to get started on a plan that perhaps you have put off for a very long time.  Today is the first day of the rest of your life.  Regardless of whether you have twenty-four hours to live or twenty-four years to begin a QUASI plan is the start button of action.  Action is the key to living a life.  Action does not have to be perfect or a promise of success.  A QUASI plan is an experiment giving permission to explore options.  Perhaps your QUASI plan will show you that this idea you have is not really what you wanted it after all.  Perhaps this QUASI experiment will give you permission to take some things off of your life’s to do list.  Yes, that is right.  Sometimes you have an idea, a bright idea, but you do not spend enough time investigating your true desire.  A QUASI plan can be your freedom card to let go of what is not serving you. 

Thursday, August 21, 2014




It is the experience of the TWENTY-MINUTE COACH that without a PLAN nothing much is accomplished.  Busy in your day-to-day world, sometimes a PLAN does not seem very important because your day is fairly scheduled.  This lack of PLANNING is where life can get tricky because when you are so busy with life’s details you don’t notice life might be just passing you by.  If you flip back to the word focus and observe those eight threads of your life what is your PLAN for each thread?   What in your life needs attention in order to make your idea, dream or goal a reality?  Intentions are nice but they usually go nowhere without a well designed strategic PLAN.   The more detailed your PLAN of action the better you will feel about what you are doing because you are able to see the small steppingstones completed along the way.  When you are not able to observe the small successes along the way discouragement often sets in and you find yourself derailed.  With a written PLAN of action you are able to check off the list of steps accomplished.  PLAN for each thread in your life as well as the stages of your life.  You hear about PLANNING your will, your retirement, and even today we pre-plan our funerals.  Hearing about something and executing a PLAN of action is the difference between living your life and watching your life from the coach of passivity.  Write a PLAN, follow it and tweak it when it needs to be adjusted.